Caregiver guide
Dementia and giving money away: spotting and solving money problems
Dementia and giving money away often go hand in hand, because the disease makes it harder to judge risk, track spending and spot a scam. Watch for unpaid bills and odd purchases, step in early with respect, and put legal protection in place while your person can still help decide.
Dementia and finances: why money is often the first sign
For many families, the first clue that something is wrong isn't forgetting a name. It's a stack of unopened mail, a late notice from the power company or a big check to a stranger.
Paying a simple bill may still be easy for your person. Harder tasks, like balancing a checkbook or reading a bank statement, often slip first. Some people try to hide mistakes because they're afraid of losing their independence. Others don't notice anything is wrong.
It's tempting to wait. But "we'll deal with it later" can mean a drained savings account. This guide covers what to look for, how to step in kindly and how to protect your person from people who take advantage. It's general information, not financial or legal advice.
What are the signs of money problems in dementia?
Look for changes in how your person handles money, and in what you find around the house.
Trouble with everyday math
Struggling to count change, pay at the register, figure out a tip or balance a checkbook.
Unpaid or unopened bills
Late notices, shut-off warnings or piles of mail that never get opened.
Paying the same bill twice
Or paying bills that aren't real.
New purchases that don't make sense
Lots of new charges on a credit card, boxes from TV shopping channels or strange new items in the house.
Money missing from the bank
Withdrawals, checks or transfers your person can't explain.
Worry or fear about money
Getting upset, anxious or secretive when money comes up.
Why do people with dementia give money away?
A parent with dementia giving money away isn't being careless on purpose. Dementia can affect the parts of the brain that weigh risk and notice when something doesn't add up. That can make a person more trusting, more generous and easier to rush.
Your person may:
- Send money to every charity that mails a letter or calls
- Say yes to a phone caller who claims a grandchild is in trouble
- Lend or give money to new "friends"
- Sign up for prizes, sweepstakes or contests that ask for a fee
- Buy things they don't need from a salesperson at the door
Being kind and wanting to help others may be part of who your person has always been. You can respect that and still protect them. For example, set aside a small amount each month that they can give freely, and protect the rest.
Why are people with dementia obsessed with money?
Some people with dementia worry about money all the time. They check their wallet over and over, say someone stole from them or ask about the bills every hour.
This often comes from fear. Money stands for safety and control, and your person can feel both slipping away. Memory loss also means they may not remember that the bills were paid this morning.
Things that can help:
- Keep a little cash in their wallet so they feel prepared.
- Show them a simple note: "Bills are paid for this month."
- Answer the feeling, not the facts: "You've always been so careful with money. It's all taken care of."
- Help them look for "missing" money instead of arguing.
If the worry is new or sudden, mention it to the doctor. If your person hides money or says someone took it, the free "Rummaging and Hiding Things" tip sheet in our caregiver resource library has more ideas.
Dementia and bank accounts: how to step in
Many older adults don't trust anyone, even family, with their money. Go slowly, include your person and keep their dignity front and center.
Start the conversation early
Frame it as learning: 'Can you show me how you handle the bills, in case I ever need to help?' Your person stays the teacher.
Get legal authority
A durable financial power of attorney lets you act for your person later. It must be signed while they can still understand it. See our guide to power of attorney for dementia.
Look at statements every month
Review bank and credit card statements together, or get online access. Look for withdrawals and charges that don't fit.
Set up safety tools at the bank
Ask about account alerts, lower daily limits and naming a trusted contact person the bank can call if something looks wrong.
Automate the basics
Set up automatic payments for the mortgage, utilities and insurance so nothing gets missed.
Keep some independence
Leave a small amount of cash, a low-limit debit card or a few voided checks so your person can still feel in charge.
Talk to an attorney before opening joint accounts
Adding your name to an account gives you full access, but it can affect taxes, inheritance and benefits. Ask first.
How to protect someone with dementia from scams and financial abuse
People living with dementia are often targeted by scammers. Sometimes the person taking advantage is a stranger. Sometimes it's a neighbor, a new "friend," a paid helper or even a relative.
Common scams include:
- Phone calls from someone pretending to be a grandchild, the IRS, Medicare or the bank
- "You've won a prize, just pay the fee" offers
- Home or car repairs that are never done, or cost far too much
- Insurance or investment offers that sound too good to be true
- Ads for pills or products that promise to fix memory
- Threats or pressure to pay right now
Signs of financial abuse to watch for:
- Signatures on checks or papers that don't look like your person's
- A new will, power of attorney or house deed your person doesn't understand
- A new "best friend" who is suddenly involved in their money
- Jewelry, cash or other belongings missing from the home
- The house or car sold without your person agreeing
Simple ways to protect your person:
- Sign up for the National Do Not Call Registry and use call blocking.
- Put a note by the phone: "Never give out bank information. Call your family first."
- Shred old statements and keep checkbooks out of sight.
- Have mail go to you or a trusted person.
- Lower credit card limits or cancel cards your person doesn't use.
What to do if you think your person was scammed
Act quickly. Money is easier to recover in the first few days.
- Call the bank or credit card company to stop payments and freeze the account if needed.
- Report it to your local police department.
- If someone is taking advantage of a vulnerable adult, call the Florida Abuse Hotline at 1-800-96-ABUSE (1-800-962-2873).
- Change passwords and PINs.
- Talk to an elder law attorney if papers were signed or property was sold.
Not sure where to start? Call ADRC at (407) 436-7750. We'll help you find the right people to call. Our Information & Referral service can also connect you with elder law attorneys in Central Florida.
Getting help with the cost of dementia care
Money worries aren't only about scams. Paying for care is one of the biggest stresses caregivers tell us about.
Help may come from Medicaid for people who qualify, veterans' benefits, Medicare's GUIDE program (a limited number of respite hours) and the Medicare hospice benefit near the end of life. See our Veterans Resources page if your person served. Florida's Elder Helpline at 1-800-96-ELDER can tell you about local programs; see our Elder Services Helplines.
A free Care Navigation session with ADRC can help you sort out what you can afford, who in the family can help and what services are nearby. And if money stress is wearing you down, you're not alone. Our free caregiver support groups are full of people who've been there, and our guide to caregiver self-care has ideas for getting through hard weeks.
If your person lives in a nursing home, they also have rights over their own money there. Read about nursing home residents' rights.
Based in part on National Institute on Aging guidance.
Questions about dementia and money
Are money problems an early sign of dementia?
They can be. Trouble with bills, a checkbook or a bank statement is often one of the first changes families notice. Money mistakes can have other causes too, so if you're worried, encourage your person to see their doctor for a full checkup.
My parent with dementia keeps giving money away. What can I do?
Don't argue or shame them. Set up safety tools at the bank, lower card limits and give them a small amount each month they can give freely. Put a durable financial power of attorney in place as soon as possible. If someone is pressuring your parent, report it to the police or the Florida Abuse Hotline at 1-800-96-ABUSE.
Can someone with dementia make financial decisions?
Sometimes. In the early stage, many people can still make simple money choices and help plan for the future. Over time, complex decisions get harder. Ability can change from day to day, so include your person as much as you safely can, and get legal papers signed while they still understand them.
Should I give my parent pretend money?
Some families find that a wallet with a little real cash, or play money that looks real, calms a person who feels lost without money. It can work well for someone who no longer shops on their own. Use your judgment and keep your person's dignity in mind. If they still go out to stores, real cash in small amounts is safer than play money.
How do I talk to my parent about money without a fight?
Pick a calm time and keep it short. Ask for their help rather than taking over: "Will you show me how you pay the bills?" Bring in someone they trust, like their doctor, pastor or lawyer, if they won't hear it from you. A free Care Navigation session can help you plan what to say.
Is there any financial help for people with dementia?
Yes, depending on income, assets and service history. Options can include Medicaid long-term care programs, veterans' benefits, Medicare's GUIDE program and hospice care. Call ADRC at (407) 436-7750 or Florida's Elder Helpline at 1-800-96-ELDER to learn what your person may qualify for.
Does someone with dementia have to pay for their own care?
Usually, care is paid from the person's own income and savings first. Medicare generally doesn't cover long-term help with daily care. Medicaid may help people with limited income and savings. An elder law attorney can explain the rules and how to plan.
What are signs someone is taking advantage of my parent's money?
Watch for signatures that don't match, missing cash or jewelry, a new will or deed your parent doesn't understand, and a new "friend" who is suddenly part of their money matters. If you see these signs, call the bank, the police or the Florida Abuse Hotline.
Download the free guide
The National Institute on Aging's two-page tip sheet on money problems is easy to print and share with siblings.
Worried about your person's money?
Alzheimer's & Dementia Resource Center (ADRC)
- Monday to Friday: 8:30 AM to 4:30 PM
The Alzheimer's & Dementia Resource Center (ADRC) in Winter Park, Florida, offers free help for caregivers in Orange and Seminole counties, including referrals to elder law attorneys; call (407) 436-7750. In an emergency, call 911. The Alzheimer's Association 24/7 Helpline is 800-272-3900.